A couple of weeks ago I, tired of their own idleness and apathy, from lack of vision, who I am and where I am going, threw a cry into the universe: help me, you are welcome, Tell, what should I do, where to direct the energy, to feel real benefits from every day lived?
Say, Вселенная (or God) never leaves people's questions unattended. And I got the answer. Circumstances of the last days (but if you look more broadly, then for a long time and in advance everything went to this) became the final answer to my question. Когда я осознал, what am I asked to do — got scared. As during , when I saw the Earth from a height in 900 meters through the open door. The only difference — I do not know, do i have a parachute now. But I am grateful for the hint and I accept the challenge.
And this decision was finally shaped by two events.
A couple of days ago we celebrated the birthday of the sister's husband.
I thought — what can I wish him, because we are almost the same age and we have, probably, in some way the same thoughts and feelings. And I came up with. And he said something like the following.
Denis, today is your birthday. Another year has passed. And there is a blank sheet ahead. И через год, дай Бог, you will celebrate DR again. And then the key question arises.: how will you live this year? What will you achieve? Are you satisfied with what you have lived 365 days of life? We all need to learn how to set goals and plan to achieve them.. I want to wish you, so that you define for yourself your goals for the next year and follow a clear plan for their implementation. These will be financial goals (how much money will you have in your pocket in a year?), health and body goals (how will you look — fit and slender or with a beer belly?), who will surround you (positive and cheerful people or depressed, винящие всех и вся личности?), career goals (will you work at the same place or will you go for a promotion?). Set your goals! Set a deadline for reaching them, plan actions and follow this plan in a disciplined manner!
I said the same thing to myself that evening. I note with regret, that life is with me «Happens». I have no clear goals, планов, hence there is no order and measurable results. I brag about my Zen outlook on life, but there is nothing from Zen here — only cowardice. I let life and His Majesty's chance determine, where to drive the ship of your life. There were periods of focus, there were plans and goals, but for a long time I was missing. I can't say for sure, в чем причина. Maybe I'm weak, maybe I'm so comfortable, maybe I just don’t appreciate life and opportunities? To the last post «» readers left some negative reviews, in which they described me very accurately. I agree with everything, what does it say.
And yesterday the second event happened. My wife found out from the social network, that our hairdresser Lena, who cut her entire family and who we knew 10 years, died at home. Thrombus. 47 she was. Her son lived in another city. Husband was not there. She became like a dear to us. And it's so bitter to realize, that she is no more. She also had periods of inspiration, when she wanted to do something, change something in your life. Then apathy and depression, change of jobs, conflicts with people and with myself. Я ей еще Books давал читать про закон притяжения и мы часто на эту тему болтали, when I picked her up or gave her a lift. When she was depressed, it was boring and uninteresting to communicate with her. Extinct look, gray thoughts. And for a while we even stopped cutting her hair. Energy is heavy. She also had a period of illness, but she scrambled out and even after that, Seemed, felt the joy of life again and began to appreciate that, what she has and dream again. She wanted to buy a motorcycle ))) And I took her home a few months ago and said: Lena, buy at least some, for a couple thousand, do not delay. You know, that my father-in-law died suddenly two years ago, when we visited them in the village. I went to the forest for blueberries and left in one minute. Сердце. 57 years. And I never thought about death either, thought everything, that there is a lot ahead of time and put off somewhere his dreams for an indefinite period, how do we all — someone is waiting for a pension, someone new apartment, someone career assignment, after which it will already be possible to think about dreams and breathe freely. And Lena listened, nodded her head, говорила «Yes, Yes…» and still carried this dream somewhere into the future…
The most offensive thing is, that she will never fulfill her dream again, and we will never hear her joyful voice or see the cheerful look of a person, who here and now feels the joy of life and strives somewhere, achieves something. Although what hindered her then and what hinders us now? Only your own thoughts and your own habits to postpone happiness for later, when will there be money, machine, apartment, another President…
Maybe you need to start rejoicing now, enjoy life now, I appreciate it, what is, noticing not bad, what surrounds, and good, which is not less. And set goals and go to them, as if there are no barriers and walls. And in this mood, desires will materialize. And if the hour comes to leave this Earth, then no one will speak, that a man lived in pursuit of ghostly goods, fighting depression and with yourself.
And the disease — reflection of a person's inner conflict. A very large number of diseases are affected by our mental state.. Offense, anger, fear, hatred, etc.. not conducive to health. We are sick inside, we are sick outside. This is not what I came up with.
What i intend to do?
Set goals and every week during a year write a blog report on your results with that, so that you, readers, could watch this experiment online and tried to change something in their life. I will be sincerely glad, if this project is successful and helps you.
Bright memory, Lena… We remember and grieve.
In the photo Lena Chernogolovaya in the center
