One person won the lottery 50 million and went to investment fund. specialist advises:
– 10 invest million in bonds, 10 million in “blue chips“, 10 million in risky stocks, 10 million in real estateh, and on 10 million buy rockets and fire on the Arabs.
– Why?!! – the lucky one is surprised.
– I do not know for sure, – specialist answers, – but the Jews do just that.
Exchange analyst And broker collide at the elevator.
Broker (maliciously):
– well, even now you will say – up or down?
Answer analytics:
– We need a clear definition on which floor we are now. In any case, we will not rise above the roof, and don't go below the basement. Although it is possible that, that the elevator gets stuck or the direction of travel changes due to an emergency.
A comment Analysts:
1. “… we will fall until then, until we grow up”.
2. “… there is a downward correction in the market now, within the upward trend, that fits into the sideways movement of the market …”.
When Albert Einstein died, in line at the gates of heaven, he met three New Zealanders. To kill some time, he asked, what is their IQ.
– 190, – answered first.
– Perfectly, – said Einstein. – We can talk to you about Rutherford's contribution to atomic physics and general relativity..
– 150, – answered the second.
– Good, – said Einstein. – We will discuss with you New Zealand's role in the fight against the proliferation of nuclear weapons.
– 50, – answered the third.
Einstein pondered, and then asked:
– Cold, then share your prediction regarding budget deficit next year.
Meet two trader. One asks the other:
– Who are you, bull or bear?
Second, looking at him with sad eyes, and says:
– Yes, I'm a goat, goat…
Trader rarely makes mistakes twice – usually three or more times
IN New York on Wall Street three homeless beggars are sitting.. One found a cardboard and wrote on it: “bum”. By the evening they gave him 3 dollar 5 Cents. The second took the cardboard and wrote: “homeless.com”. By the evening he had a laptop and a 256K channel. And the third wrote: “e-homeless”. Company Microsoft immediately signed a million dollar contract with him to develop an e-commerce project “e-homeless-Millennium”. By the evening all New York was talking about him. Oracle announced 100% e-bum technology support. Intraday-traders Europay announced the start of promotion with the company “e-bum” joint brands. Companies were urgently set up overnight “HighTech is a homeless person”, “CyberBroker is a homeless person”, “OnLineTrader-e-homeless” And “Mobil-e-bum-Telecom”. In the morning on stock exchanges the whole world, there was a landslide fall of all “e-bum”-companies….
The best way to make small deposit – open up big and be patient…
The analyst knows no more than you, but his ignorance is better organized
– What the futures trading in primitive people?
– Exchange of two axes for the skin of an unkilled bear.
Analysts, making predictions, are divided into two classes:
– Those, who don't know, what's going to happen.
– Those, who don't know, that they don't know it.
Two trader went on a hot air balloon trip. Suddenly a strong wind blew, and the buddies are off course. Going down to the height 20 meters, they saw a man below:
– Hey, Buddy, Tell, where did we end up?
– You are in a hot air balloon 20 meters above the ground.
– The answer is absolutely accurate and completely useless.. Looks like, we
met exchange analyst?!
– Yes. And you, maybe, traders, you never know, where are you.
IN analytics ask :
– Tell, and your predictions always coincide?
– Certainly, always, only the dates sometimes do not match…
Ad: A finance company needs a chief accountant. Schedule work – three years later.
Letter to the tax office: “In the last days I have completely lost sleep: tormented by conscience, because he did not indicate the amount of his income in the declaration. I send 500 Dollars. If I don't fall asleep today, then I will send the rest…”
What is the difference investor from the speculator? Speculativet buy cheap, but sells dearly, and investor buys expensive, but can't sell at all.
Analyst to trader: – Do you remember, I told you three months ago, what's the situation on stock market – “it just doesn't get worse”? So here, then everything was just great.
Personally, I investing moneyand into vodka! Where else can you get 40%?
One adventurous and lucky trader I hung a horseshoe over my desk “for luck”. Colleagues laugh: “Boy, do you really believe in such prejudices?!” “well, Certainly, – No. But, they say, this thing works no matter, do you believe in it or not!”
Buried trader, deceased at work from heart failure. Workmates are walking in the procession, and one of them says to the other: – But if the deceased had lived ten minutes longer, definitely on stop-loss ran into.
Boy asks dad: "Who it trader?»
Dad answers: "Understand, son, man buys a rabbit on the outskirts for 1 p. lucky to the center sells for 2 p. Then he goes to the outskirts, buys 2, sells in the center for 4 p. And as a result, he buys rabbits with all the money and brings them to the center, and there is a flood. Stands and thinks: I had to buy fish!»
While the dealer was understanding the situation – the situation has changed dramatically.
Trader in the casino. on roulette 3 red falls out several times in a row.
Trader:
– Hmm, yes it is a trend!
Experienced trader teaches a beginner:
– Remember, opening a position, an intelligent person always doubts everything. Only a fool can be completely sure of something.
– Are you sure of this, master?
– Absolutely.
Trader to trader:
– How much is twice two?
– We buy or sell?
Market, certainly, bad, but i was sleeping, like a baby – woke up every hour and cried…
– Dad, I want to be trader.
– Only through my stupor.
– well, generally, I have already leaked 100 pieces per stock exchange…
Stupid trader readily hides, smart – boldly pulls out!
There may come a moment in every person's life, when any paper becomes valuable.
Lieutenant Rzhevsky asks Natasha Rostova: – Natasha, would you give for 100 Dollars? – Naturally, lieutenant… – And for 100 rubles? – Phew, lieutenant, what a vulgar you are. – Yes no, I was just clarifying spread.
In Shanghai, a guide takes two tourists into an opium smoker and persuades them to try a couple of puffs..
– No effect, – boastfully declares the first, punching myself in the chest.
– Doesn't work at all, – agrees the second.
After the second puff, the first one shoots out:
– Resolved! Today I buy a test Microsoft shareholding!
– Sorry, Vasya, – the second answers, – but I'm not going to sell them!
How much is twice two?
Trader: three – for cash; four – wholesale; five – by cashless.
An Indian professor of economics at a lecture explains to careless students his theory of transmigration of the soul. "Good, capable economist in the next life has a chance to become a physicist. A lazy, silly economist – in the next life will study sociology. "
On the first day of the creation of the world, God created light, and Satan created darkness to spite him. On the second day, God created sex, and Satan – getting married. On the third day, God created broker, and Satan thought a little and created another broker.
In New York, he died in extreme poverty stock market analyst. His comrades, Brokers And traders, decided to organize a fundraiser for the poor fellow's funeral. One buck each. Learning about it, The president New York Stock Exchange exclaimed: “One dollar for an analyst's funeral?!!! Here's a check for $10.000 and bury them all!”
Dies old broker and calls his three sons to him. – You, – appeals to the elder, – you will inherit my house, and you will live there with your family. – You, – speaks to the average, – i leave all my money. – And you,- he continues the conversation with the younger,- only of three sons, who inherited my profession. I leave you two of my clients, who will feed you all your life.
Famous American banker John P. Morgan c 1929 a few days before stock market crash managed to get rid of almost all shares, which he owned. US Congressional Commission suspects Morgan of using insider information and market manipulation. The banker explained, that a shoe shiner helped him save his capital from the crisis, which the, cleaning his shoes, inquired about the prospects for the shares of the railway company, which he bought. “When a shoe shiner comes to market, there is nothing more for professionals to do on it,”- the financier decided.
Sit on stock exchange Pound and Dollar. Then the door swings open, and includes Euro – young, beautiful, slim, in a short skirt. The dollar immediately rushed to her. Pound, holding the dollar, He speaks: “Eh, youth! Look, don't catch inflation!”
Surgeon, architect and financier argued, whose profession arose earlier. The surgeon said: “Certainly, surgery. God took Adam's rib and made Eve out of it. This was the first surgery. This was nothing before”. The architect said: “Wait! The Lord was the first architect – he created a world out of chaos for 7 days. Before that there was nothing”. The financier pulled the cigar out of his mouth and said: “Gentlemen, And who created this chaos”?
“How much is 2x2?” – asked the housewife, mathematician and economist. The housewife answered without hesitation “4”. Mathematician, a little reflection, quoth: “4, but for accuracy I must check my theoretical calculations”. The economist closed the doors to the office, pulled the curtains, sank gently into a chair, And, staring intently at his interlocutor, Asked: “How much would you like to receive?”
Story trader: “Bought RAO UES, sold RAO UES … apartment, Car, dacha.”
Growing up carefully, so as not to scare off the bears.
8 Sure signs, what is your boyfriend – Intraday trader: 1) He invites you to dinner at a chic restaurant or a cheap eatery, depending on whether, what bill gates said today. 2) Sex for him – same trading, he cannot hold one position for more than two minutes. 3) When you ask if your bottom looks too round in new pants, he answers: "I'm sorry, Expensive, can't say. I have inside information ". 4) Seems, he doesn't notice, that he has been wearing the same shirt and underwear for the second week. 5) He is nervous, whenever you mention the "children's fund". 6) Helping your kid to draw a picture, he writes "RAO UES of Russia 0.0185". 7) Dinner menu. Yesterday: lobster, black caviar, duck l’orange, creme brulee. Today: oatmeal. 8) And the last: It's not because of you that he screams “YAHOOOO!!!!!!!!”
Two tired trader coming home from work, One speaks to the other: “Listen already 3 o'clock, metro closed”; second: “And how much”?
Three homeless beggars are sitting on Wall Street in New York.. One found a cardboard and wrote on it: “bum”. By the evening they gave him 3 dollar 5 Cents. The second took the cardboard and wrote: “homeless.com”. By the evening he had a laptop and a 256K channel. And the third wrote: “e-homeless”. Microsoft immediately awarded him a million dollar contract to develop an e-commerce project. “e-homeless-Millennium”. By the evening all New York was talking about him. Oracle announced 100% e-bum technology support. VISA and Europay announced the start of promotion with the company “e-bum” joint brands. Companies were urgently set up overnight “HighTech is a homeless person”, “CyberBroker is a homeless person”, “OnLineTrader-e-homeless” And “Mobil-e-bum-Telecom”. In the morning on the stock exchanges of the whole world there was a landslide fall of all “e-bum”-companies….
Broker calls the client: – There are two news: good and bad. – Come on bad first. – Your shares have collapsed, so the account is closed and you are completely broke. – A good? – It all happened on a thin volume.
The Financier's Prayer: “God, restructure our debts to us!”
Investor asks his investment advisor: – Really, all my money is gone? Every penny is gone? He answers: why disappeared?! It's just that they now belong to someone else.
Broker: – I don’t need someone else, that's why I'm selling….
Customer – investment consultant: – I would like to invest my money in taxes, I heard, that they will grow very soon!
A sociological experiment was conducted in America. The physicist was settled in different rooms, math and day trader. Everyone was given metal balls. A month later, the researchers decided to find out, what are their charges. They're watching: Physicist has built some new molecule. Come to the mathematician – he adds a certain formula. Visit a trader – no balls: “Where are the balls???”. Trader: “Where, Where is …. lost …”.
The Central Bank of Russia issues a new commemorative coin in denomination “One minimum wage”.
At school, in a math lesson, the teacher asks: – Mashenka, who does your dad work for? – My dad – engineer. – How much does he earn? – 2 thousand rubles. – And mom? – Mama – the teacher. Earns 1,5 thousand rubles. – What is your family's budget? – 3,5 thousand rubles. – Well done, right. Johnny answers. – well, my ancestors – financiers. Dad – director of a financial company. Earns 2 thousands. Mama – chief accountant of the bank. Receives 3 thousands. And our family's budget turns out – 300 thousand. – Badly, Little Johnny, A couple! Little Johnny sits down at the desk and thinks: “And to hell with her, with two. But how people live!!!!”
Tip of the day from “Microsoft”: Fallen shares “MICROSOFT” try to recover from the installation floppy.
Trader summoned to the tax office. – Here you indicated in the income statement for last year, that you earned ten thousand, and, according to our data, have you spent during this time, least, million. What does it mean? – What means… Can't make ends meet!
Broker The bartender: – Yet 100 gram of investment, and I – real estate!
An elderly client conspiratorially asks his consultant: “And it’s true, that the dollar is set by the centroband?»
Broker small investment company, reading the latest financial news, says to his colleague: – Check this out, another financial giant fell, and this one also covered up, …and he went bankrupt. So soon we will enter the top ten leaders.
The son comes up to the financier dad and asks: – Dad tell, and what is the point of taking money for storage? – In terms of?.. – Well, a client comes to you, gives you his money, and leaves. After a while comes and takes them away. But how much money was there and remained… What is your benefit? – Do you understand son… I'll explain now.. Go to the kitchen and get the bacon out of the fridge. Got it out? Now put it on the table… Put it down? Now take the bacon and put it back in the refrigerator. – Dad, fat, how much there was, and there is still… – Yes, right. But the fingers are fat….
Why sharks never attack economists? – Professional ethics does not allow.
The economist decided to visit his institute. He wanted to know, what questions are asked now in exams. How surprised he was, having learned, that they are exactly the same, like ten years ago. – The questions are the same, answers have changed – explained the old professor.
Astrologer and economist argued. The astrologer says - "Astrology – more exact science. Our predictions come true in 50% cases, your – cannot reach this level. Economist – “This is due to external crises. They are not on the stars "
– Why God Made Economists? – Forecasters look solid against their background., and astrologers.
In a lecture in economics, the professor talks about “typical basic assumptions, assumptions "when building a new economic model. Question: "Professor, what will happen to the economy, if all prerequisites are discarded, assumptions, assumptions?" Professor: "It will just become an accounting department."
Little boy asks daddy-trader: – Dad, and why does the tale say “…and he called the goldfish "? – Understand, son, there were no mice then.
Say, that Columbus was the first economist. When he went to discover America, he did not know, where is going. When he reached her, he did not know, where was. And he did all this with public funds..
Finance company: we are monitoring, marketing, factoring, forfeiting, we organize trading, margin, clearing, we lease, we will provide consulting, also obegoring, stibring and swaling.
– What is the true ratio in the ruble market, dollar and pound? – A pound of rubles costs exactly one dollar.
Why woman – joint-stock company.
When she was not yet born, she is a 100% subsidiary of her mother, its integral part. After birth, its shares are distributed within the holding, which we call family. Some percentage goes to the father's possession, significant package (often control) remains with the mother, grandparents also get a share, but often they – clear minority shareholders. Gradually the girl grows up, becomes an adult, and at the same time transfers the shares of the family holding to its balance sheet by means of additional issues or simply by repudiating during home conversations.
And now, by the end of the school, the golden time of the IPO comes (initial public offering).
Usually, at a time like this, girls don't squander a controlling stake, but sell only small parts of it for the purpose “probe for interest” market. Parents can act as IPO advisors, but often they are more mature girls, already experienced in IPOs. They can suggest the right marketplace, make an independent valuation of assets and recommend a price. Numerous road-shows are held in dance clubs before the IPO, close, squares and other places where young investors congregate. They are, however, are also not interested in receiving a controlling stake at once. The position of some large strategic investors on such IPOs is interesting. They buy option to buy a controlling stake, receive dividends for a certain period, but in the end the option remains unfulfilled. By idea, such cases should be punished, but not all issuers are ready to disclose such information, because it could damage further listing and liquidity.
After school and until about 40 years old girls-issuers begin the initial placement of a controlling stake in their shares. but, investors won't be able to get it so easily. First you need to collect at least 1% from the authorized capital, to view the register of shareholders. This makes it clear the prospects and approximate timing of the purchase of the control. Next, a blocking stake is bought, the investor enters the Board of Directors and influences the financial and production flows of the issuer. If the issuer is good, actively developing, it has high profitability and great prospects, then the investor gets the shares to the controlling stake and everyone is happy. This is a fortunate development of events.
To the question, how many dividends a woman should pay there are many theories.
If an investor is interested in current income, then he chooses an issuer with large dividend payments. but, this leads to a reduction in capital investments in the renewal of fixed assets, which in the future leads to asset depreciation and, as a consequence, a rapid reduction in profits and dividends. In our opinion, dividend policy must be consistent with the sustainable development of the company.
Cross-ownership is common in the market. This is the situation, when the woman of the issuer has preferred shares, held by third-party shareholders. They don't have the right to vote, but receive stable small dividends. Therefore, investors love, when the issuer has no preferred shares. By the way, many men like to have stocks of several issuers in their portfolio: controlling stake in one issuer and a small percentage of preferred shares of other issuers. This is one of the paradoxes of the market.
If the IPO is unsuccessful and it is not possible to place a controlling stake right away, stocks of the female issuer go to the stock exchange. This is where the fun begins. Most liquid female issuers trade on “exchanges”, they passed the listing, information about them is known to investors. Data on these companies can be found even on the Internet., they have their own sites. but, it does not mean, that their shares can show strong growth, as many of them are overvalued by the market. Rather, investors prefer to speculate with them, avoiding long-term investments.
The most valuable are securities “second echelon”. This is exactly what growth stocks are.. Only a certain circle of players knows about them., and they are bought by strategic investors. Here they cannot do without analytical support., as you need to calculate the fair value of the shares, find out who the main shareholders are, etc..
A serious issue of the owner of the issuer is the creation of subsidiaries. At the initial stages of work “welcome” these are direct costs for the parent company, and without a guaranteed economic effect in the future. but, it can improve the investment climate and the issuer-investor relationship. The presence of subsidiaries also lowers the issuer's liquidity, what well, when an investor wants to get minority stakes from the market. Investors love to compile indices based on quotes from women issuers, to represent the general market situation. This is where phrases like “in such and such a place (the city, country) issuers are the most beautiful”.
The Russian market is considered one of the most attractive and undervalued in the world. The capitalization of issuers is not very large here, but in terms of fundamental indicators (earnings per share, dividend yield, etc.) they are stronger than foreign counterparts. This explains the significant interest of foreign investors in Russian assets.. Investors love to discuss issuers, share your views on the market, share experiences. Since this usually happens “on the market”, At the same time, potential investment objects are being studied. This is important for newbie investors, since they tend to buy a publicized illiquid product.
A significant part of investors will part with a controlling stake in the issuer after a few years, and translates into rapidly growing stocks of young companies. This is associated with high transaction costs., but investors go to them in the hope of a good return on new investments. Anyway, this is a risky step, as the investor refuses stable income and transparent business in favor of a new little-known issuer. In our opinion, you need to be absolutely sure of the need “investment portfolio shake-up” before starting it.
Basic tips for investors.
Do not get carried away with speculation in the market, it can be ruinous.
Do not invest all funds at once in one issuer. It's risky.
Don't trust on 100% analysts' recommendations. Be sure to spend your, at least a minimal grade.
By purchasing a controlling stake in the issuer, don't relax. There is always a possibility of additional issue, which will dilute your stake.
Women like to give their shares in par.. Make Sure, that the shares actually ended up in your account.
By purchasing a controlling stake, do not skimp on capital investments and significant depreciation charges. The bigger they are, so you can expect big dividends in the future. It is better to buy a controlling stake like this, to market this “did not see”, otherwise, there is a risk of greatly raising quotes and overpaying.
And further: for financiers
Initial prerequisites for investing in a man.
How there is no perfect investment vehicle, there is no perfect man.
All men, like investment instruments, have three essential characteristics: reliability; liquidity; profitability. Reliable men, usually, have low profitability. Men with high incomes are unreliable. Unreliable men with low income are not liquid. It is very difficult to get rid of them.. Reliable and profitable men have very high liquidity. The problem is, that they are difficult to find and even more difficult to keep in your investment portfolio.
The high demand for reliable and high-income men leads (sometimes suddenly), to that, that they are losing or their reliability, or your profitability. As they say – the paper has gone bad.
Diversify. In order to avoid large life drawdowns with a reasonable profitability, it is recommended to order 70% time to invest in reliable low-income men, 25% in several highly profitable, but unreliable and no more 5% in reliable and highly profitable (cm. P. 7)
If you were given the opportunity to acquire a controlling stake in a reliable and highly profitable man, then you missed something.
A man asks the head of a large enterprise: – You need a nautical accountant? – What is it like? – Half to you, half of me and ends in water!
Three analyst economists on the hunt. They see a big deer. One takes aim, shoots, missed – one meter to the left. Three times – takes aim, shoots, missed – one meter to the right. Third analyst, without shooting: "Well., average,- we killed him!»
A group of economists climbs in the Alps. Completely lost our way. One lays out the card, twirls her, measures distances, orients by compass, Then – by the sun. Finally says: “You see that big mountain ?» – "YES!»- “So, judging by the map we are now standing on top of it!»
Trader, Engineer, and the Accountant went on a journey, they stay for the night in a small country hotel. The owner says: ” I only have two beds, one of you will have to sleep in the barn”. The engineer went to the barn. Went to bed. All of a sudden – knock on the door, on the doorstep – engineer. Engineer: ” There is a cow in the barn, I – Hindu, and religion won't let me sleep next to a sacred animal”. The accountant agreed: “Good, I'll go to the barn”. Returns in a minute. "There – pig, and I am a Jew. My faith won't let me sleep with a dirty animal”. Then the Trader went to the barn. In a minute – knock on the door. Open. On the doorstep – pig and cow.
Two traders are sitting, get drunk, drunk already. It's snowing outside the window, one says: – Listen, It's snowing! Another: – We will wait another five minutes and take.
An old trader dies. The whole family gathers at their deathbed. The doctor takes out the thermometer and sadly announces: 39. The dying man opens one eye and wheezes: “Will be 40 – sell!”
What is the difference between a prostitute and a trader? – Her price does not depend on the market maker and she cannot do both directions at once in two positions …
There is a queue in paradise. They escorted past some twitchy guy out of line.
Lodged in a drop dead palace. The Pope stands at the end of the line and is indignant:
– I am the pope, all things, almost saint, and the man was settled in my palace.
They answer him: – Popes with us to hell, and an honest broker got caught for the first time.
If you mistake a trend reversal for a minor pullback every time, then wouldn't it be better for you to go to the house manager?
– What is the difference between the dollar and the ruble?
– The difference between them is equal to one dollar.
New York. Noon. Heat.
Old Jew Moishe sells seeds on the marble staircase of Bank of New York.
They turn to him: “Moishe. Lend”.
“Not allowed, – he answers. – In our agreement with the Bank of New York”
“Ah, Moishe, you left, you can't have an agreement, issued – contract, Well tell me what kind of agreement?”
“I do not lend, and Bank of New York does not trade seeds!”
Blacksmith got to Afghanistan. After a while he will find out, what for the killed dushman give $25, and for the living – $50. On the same day leads to the part 10 prisoners.
Commander in a difficult position – not at the checkout $500.
– Let me give you $40 for the head I will give – after all $400 will.
– E, No. Along $40 I took them from the leader myself.
The stockbroker made a huge pile of money for good luck.
A lot and completely unexpected. Almost like I found.
Being a non-greedy person, he gave some of the money to his friends, Saying – “give it back at my funeral.”
Time has passed.. One friend became a doctor. Second – politics. The third – followed the path of a financier. When their benefactor died, they all came to the funeral, to fulfill my last duty to a friend, including financial.
The doctor said – “I spent more, what did you earn” and put in a coffin 1/10 part of the debt.
The politician said – “I promise, I'll give the rest, when we meet again in another life” and put 1/5 part of the debt.
The financier came up and said – ” You know me my friend, I'm not such a miser, how are my comrades – i will give you everything right now” – and with these words put in the coffin immediately written out in the name of the deceased his own bill of exchange.
Two Jewish investors talking:
1-and: You keep your shares?
2-and: As where?! At the depository, certainly.
1-and: I also kept mine there at first, but then it seemed to me unreliable and I put them in the safe at work. Then it seemed to me unreliable and I put them under the mattress to my wife. But you can't always trust your wife either., and I put my shares in the MOST safe place – in my underpants. So what do you think?! They don't rise now either!!!
Agency “Chechen Press” reports quotes for today.
For the release of one journalist:
American journalists: $500 000
German journalists: $600 000
According to Russian journalists, the auction was not held today.
The shepherd, drove a flock of sheep, stopped by a passerby:
– I put 100 dollars versus sheep, that I will tell you the exact number of heads in the herd.
The shepherd agreed.
– 973, – said a passerby.
The surprised shepherd just threw up his hands:
– Take the sheep, I am a man of my word.
The man picked up the animal and was about to leave.
– Hold on, give a chance to win back, – the shepherd stopped him. – We argue, I will say, What are you doing?
The man agreed.
– You – economist, who works in government.
– Absolutely accurate! – admired by a passer-by. – But tell, how did you guess?
– I'll tell you, – answered the shepherd, – but first let my dog go.
Three economists and three mathematicians are going to travel by train. Before the trip, mathematicians bought three tickets, while economists – one. Mathematicians decided to have plenty of fun, looking, how their stupid colleagues will pay the fine.
As soon as the conductor began to approach the economists' compartment, all three of them went to the nearest toilet. Conductor, noticing, that someone is in the toilet, knocked in the door. In response, a hand with a ticket was extended. The conductor punched him, returned and left.
Frustrated mathematicians have calculated, what economists managed to save 2/3 ticket prices.
The next day, the mathematicians decided to use the winning strategy themselves and bought only one ticket. And economists didn't buy at all.
When the mathematicians saw the controller, they locked themselves in the toilet and when they heard a knock they held out a ticket. Someone took it, but did not return it back. Why?
Yes, because, that economists went to the next toilet with this ticket.
The economist went to the pizzeria to order pizza. When the pizza was ready, the waiter asked:
– Cut it into six or eight pieces?
– I'm especially hungry today. Cut into eight.
Stock Exchange Panic: Moldova has again inflated prices for dill.
